


i’m not kissing Keith

by treesandbees



Series: freaky friday [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Bodyswap, Curses, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gay Keith (Voltron), Gay Shiro (Voltron), Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Missions, Multi, POV Outsider, Secret Relationship, Shiro (Voltron) is a Mess, Shiro (Voltron)-centric, Shiro is a meme
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-26
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2019-12-18 13:36:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18250919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/treesandbees/pseuds/treesandbees
Summary: “I think we switched bodies or something?”“What is this, Freaky Friday? Our lives aren’t a film, Lance!” He said hysterically.“You’ve seen Freaky Friday? But you’re so old?”“Lance.” He said incredulously. “I’m twenty five.” Is this what a mental breakdown feels like? He puts his face into his hands and shakes his head. “Why is that the focus? We switched bodies!”(the one where Lance and Shiro switch bodies)





	1. Chapter 1

He grits his teeth as sweat drips down his forehead. Bringing up a hand, he wipes the sweat out his eyes, swiping back to push back his hair out of his eyes.

He’s at the front of the group, leading the way to the city they’ve been tasked to find. Allura had sent them to get a special Zathum Crystal from the planet, which is needed to give the ship some extra power.

They’ve been walking for almost an hour, and, while Shiro would usually be fine with that, the heat was getting to them all, making them all irritable and sluggish.

He turns back to look at the other paladins. Hunk is pulling at the neck of the suit anxiously, his face dismayed, Shiro figures, at the heat.

And unusually, while Pidge had been the one complaining the most, Lance is unusually quiet. Shiro eyes him suspiciously, but Lance stays silent.

Keith, as expected, is marching ahead, a blank expression on his face, not showing any sign of being affected by the weather.

Shiro watches helplessly as Pidge trips over Lance’s leg trying to escape a particularly nasty looking insect. She topples backwards into Lance but he steps away, letting her fall. She lands in a heap, her hands still waving around in the air frantically, trying to get the bug away.

Lance and Hunk _absolutely_ lose it. Hunk bends over, wheezing out pitifully as he clutches his stomach. Even Keith laughs, gaining a hard glare from Pidge, who is still laying on the floor in a heap.

Seeing her enraged look, Shiro decides to step in before she gets back up and chooses to kill the others. He stops and folds his arms, giving them all disapproving looks. He offers Pidge a hand, which she takes grumpily, muttering about ‘weird spiked alien moths’.

Lance just continues to cackle, nearing hysterics, as Hunk wipes away the tears in his eyes.

“Lance, Hunk.” He warns, trying his best to be a good leader and keep the group focused. It doesn’t work, of course. (He’s struggling not to laugh too much. It ruins the effect.)

“Oh come on, Shiro! That was hilarious!” Lance cries. Hunk’s lips quiver in an effort to keep a straight face. “I bet you’re laughing inside, under that serious dad face.”

“Lance.” Shiro sighs. Fuck, he really is not fit to be leading four teenagers. Especially when that group includes Lance. He counts for at least three people, Shiro thinks. “Come on, we need to be there before the afternoon.”

He turns swiftly, starting back up the steady pace. It was actually pretty funny. He bites his lower lip in an effort to keep from laughing and keeps walking.

* * *

He brings up the map for the sixth time in the last minute. He squints at it again, drops it, frowns at the landscape in front of them, and then re-checks the map.

Well, that’s not right. It says there’s supposed to be a city of towers, with hover cars and aircrafts flying around above it. That’s what Allura had said, anyway.

Shiro looks up again at the barren desert in front of him. The thing that most resembles a tower, where they are right now, is a group of caves.

Fucking hell. Why is he in charge again?

“Um, Shiro? Are we there yet?” Lance pipes up.

Ahh, yes. That’s why. He’s the oldest and, _supposedly_ , the most responsible of the group.

Keith snorts. “Obviously not, Lance, we’re supposed to be in a town. We’re lost, clearly.” Keith’s impatient tone was, of course, nothing new, and even though Shiro doesn’t especially like it, he’s given up trying to stop their arguing. But, for once, (shocking everyone) Lance doesn’t argue back.

When Lance doesn’t reply, Shiro looks up at him out of the corner of his eyes. Lance’s expression seems strangely dampened, and he looks at Keith angrily, before turning his back away from him.

Keith looks immediately regretful at Lance’s reaction. His face crumples slightly, wincing at Lance’s turned back.

Well, _that’s_ new. These things usually end with Shiro having to hold the two by the throats to stop them from killing each other!

Shiro’s brows raise slightly, his eyes flickering between them like a tennis match. He looks at Pidge, catching her eye. She just shrugs at him cluelessly.

He catches Keith stealing another look at Lance.

Even weirder.

He notices Keith’s eyes are drawn to Lance yet _again_ , and he might be reaching, but it looks like Keith is...  
worried.

But why would Keith care about offending Lance? He never has before. Keith just isn’t the sort of person to be troubled over his own petty comments.

Another look and Shiro catches Keith’s eye. His face immediately closes off, and he picks out his Bayard, striding off.

Shiro sighs, rubbing his temples with his fingers.

He’s not old enough for this shit.

* * *

They can’t get into contact with Allura and have no idea where they are, so eventually decide their only option, for now, is to explore the caves.

Allura had said in the briefing that the easiest way to get some would be to find a supplier in the city, however, the crystals originate from caves throughout the planet.

If these are the right caves, they won’t even need to find the city- problem solved.

Pidge, luckily, has a picture of the rock and has read into it, so can tell them where to find it in the caves. They split off into two groups of two; Hunk and Keith and Lance and Shiro, with Pidge directing from the top.

Shiro decides to take Lance with him because he’s still acting strange. And, as their unofficial leader, Shiro feels obligated to try and get to the bottom of what’s bothering Lance.

He tries straight away to confront Lance.

“So, Lance, you doing okay?” He says awkwardly.

They were scaling the wall of the cave, attempting to get into an opening at the top, to search the rest of the area. Probably not the best time to try and start a serious conversation about Lance’s problems.

Fuck, he was terrible at this.

“Yeah. All good up here. No sign of the crystal though.” Lance replies, climbing onto another rock.

Shiro wanted to throw his hands up into the air dramatically, but that would mean letting go of the rock, which he was very much holding onto dear life for.

Why does he have to be the responsible one?

“I mean, is everything okay with you? You seemed quiet today, Lance.”

Lance is silent for a moment, and all Shiro can hear is the sound of hands hitting rock and heavy breathing.

“Yeah, I’m fine. All good in the hood. I’m chilling, you know. Everything’s great.”

No one who is fine, says that they’re fine _that_ many times. Shiro knows these things, he’s watched tv, okay? Something is up.

“You sure you’re not anxious or upset about anything?” Shiro, at last, lifts a leg up over the hole in the wall and heaves himself up.

Lance is quiet. Shiro sits down in the cramped makeshift corridor, waiting for Lance to get through.

“Yeah, well something happened recently, that-“ Lance grunts loudly as he pulls his body up. “Well, it’s not bad, I mean at all! It’s like the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” Lance’s face is red, but Shiro can’t tell if it’s for exhaustion or embarrassment. “And I’m just scared. Of messing up and ruining this good thing. But that’s all. Nothing bad is happening, you don’t need to worry about it.”

Shiro nods patiently, but inside he has a whirlwind of questions flooding through his mind. What is this good thing? What could Lance possibly be afraid of losing in space?

“Also, this thing is a fucking prick that gets on my nerves.” Lance smiles crookedly to himself, not meeting Shiro’s eyes, as if he’s telling a joke that Shiro’s not in on.

Shiro just stares.

What on _earth_ did that mean?

* * *

They continue to walk through the corridors, checking every so often to see if Pidge had heard anything from Allura. Keith and Hunk had also found nothing so far.

“Maybe we should go back?” Lance says.

Shiro thinks for a moment. They haven’t found anything after twenty minutes. These probably aren’t even the right types of caves for the crystals their looking for.

“Okay, good idea Lance.” He taps his comm on. “Team, we’re heading back, Keith and Hunk you too do the same. Well meet back in twenty and go from there. Okay?”

A chorus of “okay” and “yes” resound through the line. He switches the sound off but leaves it on so Pidge can track their movements. Hopefully, they’ll be able to go back the way they came and won’t even need her to direct them, but better safe than sorry.

It takes them five minutes to get utterly lost.

“Are you _sure_ we shouldn’t have taken that last turning? I feel like it looked familiar.”

“Yes, Lance, for the hundredth time, I am sure.”

“Wait, let’s just double check okay? I don’t recognise any of this stuff.”

Neither did Shiro. Okay, that was a fair point.

“Okay, let’s go back.”

They reach the tunnel Lance spoke about and quickly walk through. It leads them to a bigger chamber that Shiro does not remember seeing before.

It has hundreds of crystals lining the edge of the room, varying in size, shape and colour.

He double taps his comms. “Guys, we found it!”

“Yeah, we did! And I did all the hard work.” Lance boasts, grinning with excitement. “I’m the one who found it after all.”

“Well done, Lance.” Shiro claps him lightly on the shoulder. Lance beams at him.

A round of congratulations comes from the comms, a whistle even coming from Hunk. Even Keith manages to sound happy about Lance’s win, but Shiro supposes he’s just happy to be getting a mission complete.

“Okay, Pidge, what we looking for.”

“It says here-“ She pauses. “Okay, I think you should be looking for a light green crystal, approximately 10 cm in height.”

Lance scoffs loudly. “I don’t carry a fucking-“

“Language.” Shiro interrupts firmly. He feels a little guilty about reprimanding the others on language when his own thoughts are full of cursing.

“-ruler around with me, you know.” Lance completely ignores him.

“Use the tool on your suit,” Pidge says. “Just make sure you get the right one! Some of the crystals in there are highly volatile and only have to be touched to react. I think some of them even have curses on them if I’m translating this correctly.”

“Awesome!” Lance fist pumps. “Finally something exciting!”

They spot a green one immediately that looks around the correct height. Lance goes to measure it, leaning over to pick it up, when Pidge shouts out through the comms.

“Don’t touch anything! It’s wrong!” Pidge orders, frantically. “Do not touch the green crystals!”

But it’s too late, Lance’s hand is already wrapped around the green crystal. Shiro reacts quickly reaching out to snatch it out of Lance’s hand, but as soon as he touches it, a shock goes through his system.

Lance shudders too, and they both fall to the floor. He sees Lance shaking on the floor violently. His eyes slip closed of their own accord.

He tries to shout, but his lips won’t move.

His eyes flutter open again. The last thing he sees before he loses consciousness is Lance.

* * *

He hears the door of the healing pods slide open before he sees anything. He stumbles forwards; his body feels light and flimsy. He reaches out his hands in front of him on reflex.

His eyes snap open. His hands?

What in the fresh _fuck_.

He’s gonna pass out again.

He has two hands. Two very tanned hands. Connected too lithe arms, that are nothing like his own. He has two arms. That are not his since he only has one fucking arm!

He repeats: _what the fuck?_

The sound of the healing pod opening again is the only thing his brain can handle right now, so he turns to look.

Oh.

He was _so_ wrong. He can't handle this.

That’s his body. He is staring at his own body walking out of the healing pod. Why can he see his body?

His body’s eyes stare at him in horror.

“What the fuck?” It comes out in Shiro’s voice, but he didn’t say it. “ _What_ _the_ _fuck_?” His mouth repeats incredulously. “Why do I sound like Shiro? No! That’s not the question to ask! Why can I see my body?” His own body asks.

“What? But you’re _my_ body? And that’s my voice!” Shiro objects.

His body stares at him for a long minute. (Wow. So weird. _So_ weird.) “Shiro?”

“Yes?” He answers.

“Shiro? What the fuck.” The body mutters. “It’s me. _Lance_.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“Look!” ‘Lance’ points at the glass of the healing pods. “You’re in my body! And I’m in yours!”

And sure enough. Lance is standing in the reflection of the glass. But it’s where he’s standing.

Okay, time to panic.

“What does this even mean?”

“I think we switched bodies or something?”

“What is this Freaky Friday? Our lives aren’t a film, Lance!” He said hysterically.

“You’ve seen Freaky Friday? But you’re so old?”

“I’m 25, Lance!” Is this what a mental breakdown feels like? He puts his face into his hands and shakes his head. “Why is _that_ the focus? _We_ _switched_ _bodies_!”

“Chill. It’s fine, Shiro. I, for one, think this is pretty cool.”

“What!” Shiro almost shrieks. His shoulder bunch up tightly. “How are you calm about this! This is _not_ normal!”

“Yeah, well neither is aliens or flying a 10,000-year-old flying robot made up of smaller lion robots, but we do that every day.”

That’s actually a good point.

“It’ll be fine, Shiro, don’t worry. We can figure it out. We’ll tell the others and we can go back and find the crystal. Or even ask Pidge if anything in that book of hers says anything.”

Shiro breathes deeply and nods. “Okay.”

“Come on.” Lance’s boyish smirk looks out of place on Shiro’s face. “It’ll be over before we know it. I, for one, intend to have fun with my new body while it lasts. I’ve never been able to fight Keith and win!” Lance claps gleefully. “I’ll destroy him in training with all these muscles.” Lance flexes his arm theatrically, bowing to imaginary crowds and blowing kisses and winks out.

Shiro rolls his eyes but smiles.

“And I’ll be able to knock out everyone in a ten-mile radius with these killer abs.”

“Lance.” He says firmly.

Lance lifts up his shirt playfully, striking a pose.

“ _Lance_!”

* * *

They find the others having dinner. As soon as they walk in, the others are all up and on their feet.

“What are you two doing up?” Coran says

“Paladins, are you okay?”

“Well, we’re living, but something else happened. We-“ Lance chokes on his words.

“Shiro, are you okay?” Keith strides up to Lance.

“I’m not-” Lance coughs again.

“What he means to say is that-“ Shiro tries to speak, but is cut off as Lance was. He throat feels sore as if he’s swallowed sandpaper, making him unable to speak.

“No that’s not what I-“ Shiro tries again, but finds himself unable to speak. He was fine to say the other words, though. It’s only when he tries to speak about the body switch that his throat clams up. Pidge _had_ said some of those crystals were cursed, what if this was all a curse?

He exchanges a panicked look with Lance. They seemed to have come to the same conclusion. They would have to pretend to be fine for the moment, worrying everyone when they couldn’t even explain why would cause unnecessary panic. They would just have to sort this out themselves.

“What?” Allura questions. “Paladins, are you two okay?”

“Yes, we’re fine.” Shiro smiles unconvincingly. “Aren’t we L-” His throat closes up again. “-Shiro.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Allura asks.

“Maybe you two should go back to the healing pods,” Coran suggests. “We didn’t expect either or you to be up and out this early anyway.”

Lance moves as if to make a wisecrack, if the look on his face is anything to go by, which Shiro frantically cuts off, his eyes gesturing wildly.

Lance draws back into himself, giving a quick, polite ‘yes, we’re fine, thank you’ to the group.

He quickly takes an empty seat at the table next to Hunk and Lance does the same, in Shiro’s normal place next to Keith.

“Are you sure?”

They both nod.

“So what happened?” They all turn to Lance, who flounders under the attention.

“Um-” Lance stumbles. “Well, Lance touched the crystal before we heard Pidge’s warning and it reacted. Nothing else happened though, nothing at all.”

“The reaction probably just knocked us out, but we’re fine now.” Shiro says seriously.

Shiro sighs in relief as the group just nods in acceptance. He shares a thankful glance with Lance.

They manage to get through dinner without any major hiccups, although, Lance at one point accidentally flirts with the princess, which causes everyone to fall silent in shock. Keith is especially confused, knowing Shiro is gay. Shiro silently wants to die.

After they've both finished eating and left enough time to make sure it doesn't feel suspicious, they leave the dinner hall both making excuses about tiredness on the way out.

“What the hell are we going to do?” Lance hisses at him, finally beginning to panic.

“We just need to pretend everything's fine. We obviously can’t say anything to the others, I’m assuming that’s part of the curse though. We can’t cause panic when we can’t explain to them what’s going on.”

“Look, I understand what you mean, but how the hell are we supposed to get help, if we don’t even tell them anything wrong! No offence dude, it’s cool being you and I would’ve liked to do it for the evening, but I do not want to be stuck in you’re body _forever_!”

“Yeah well, neither do I!” Shiro whispers back furiously. He sighs, reaching up to push back his fringe before realising it isn’t there. “Look, we’ll just have to go to bed early. I’ll come and get you tomorrow morning and we’ll get Pidge’s book. Hopefully, it should tell us more about the curse.”

Instead of looking comforted, Lance suddenly looks even more stressed.

“Oh, no.” He mumbles.

“What? What is it?” Anxiety spikes in Shiro's chest. This doesn't sound good.

“Well.” Lance looks down at his boots, twisting his fingers together awkwardly. It’s a weird look on Shiro’s body. Everything looks weird because it is Shiro’s body. His brain is seemingly only just catching up to this fact. Lance simply stays silent, his eyes still glued to the floor.

“Yes?” Shiro prompts.

“There’s something I need to tell you. But I’m not supposed to tell you. But I kind of need to if we can’t find an immediate solution.”

Shiro feels uneasy. “What is it, Lance?”

“Fuck, this is so awkward,” Lance mumbles into his hands. “I’m not supposed to be even telling you this! It’s supposed to be top-secret stuff, you know?”

“You know, you don’t have to tell me anything you’re uncomfortable about, Lance.”

“Yeah but I kind of need to.” He sighs. “Okay, so, Keith and I are- well, we’re kind of, sort of... dating.”

His mouth falls open.

What? Keith and Lance? _That_ Keith and Lance? The ones who hate each other? The ones that fight over literally anything? Shiro remembers the time he saw them punch each other over how to pronounce ‘tomato’.

He can’t contain his disbelief. “What?”

Lance grins at his reaction, but Shiro can sense a nervousness about him. “Yeah, I know. It’s crazy. But I really like him. And it’s super new, so we didn’t want to tell anyone yet, in case it ended badly or quickly fizzled out and things got awkward.”

Shiro’s brain has had enough. “Okay.” Is all he says.

“That’s not all.” Lance flushes slightly.

Of course, it’s not all. Why would this be all? Why would Shiro get a break? Body switching with Lance and then finding out Keith and Lance are dating? That's nothing, of course, there's more. He sighs, bracing himself for what is coming next.

“We’re sleeping together.”

Shiro is not proud of the screech that comes out of his mouth at that sentence, but he feels like it’s justified.

Lance turns fuchsia. “No! Not like that! I mean we are, but that’s not what I meant! I mean he’s sleeping in my room. Fucking hell.”

This is terrible. Shiro just wants to throw his hands up to the sky and curse at God dramatically like he’s in the montage of a film.

This is fucking awful. Honestly, the worst day of his life.

"And since we don't have an immediate solution..." He trails off.

Shiro suddenly sees where this going. “Well, I’m sure as hell not sleeping in the same bed as him! He’s like my little brother!”

“Yeah I know, but I don’t want him to think I don’t like him anymore, you know. We need to think of a good excuse on why he can’t sleep with me tonight.”

That's actually kind of sweet.

“I’ll pretend you’re sick,” Shiro says. “Then I can use the excuse that I don’t want to get him sick so he sleeps in his own bedroom!”

“Okay,” Lance says. “Just make sure it seems realistic. I don’t want him to think I’m having second thoughts or anything like that.”

Shiro’s heart melts at the sight of Lance’s anxious face. He nods. “Of course, Lance.”

Lance's patented grin reappears. “You’re a good actor, right?”

Shiro thinks it’s best for both of them that he doesn’t answer that.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, sorry it’s been a while. i actually wrote part of this up ages ago but i’m not exactly sure where i want this fic to go so i kinda just ignored it and hoped for inspo, but since nothing came imma just post it already

Shiro pads slowly to the bathroom rubbing his eyes with his hand. His mind feels foggy with sleep, preoccupied only with the thought of getting into the shower.

He unclothes blindly, his eyes still screwed closed, his body refusing to accept the fact that he’s awake.

The cold water streams down his back, which wakes him up immediately, he sighs as it turns warm, reaching for the soap.

The hand that holds the soap is not his. He lets out an undignified shriek and almost slips as he retreats backwards on instinct.

No, no, no, no, _no_.

He groans.

It can’t be real. It had to be a dream. _How_ was that not a dream?

He tips his head back, looking up at the ceiling and just screams silently, cursing any and every deity out there.

He turns the shower off, quickly grabbing a towel to cover Lance’s body- he doesn’t want to see anything more than he already has. Bracing his hands on the sides of the sink, he breathes deeply, trying to regain control.

Do not have a mental breakdown, Shiro.

Fuck his life.

He needs to talk to Lance.

He jumps into action, getting dressed in Lance’s normal attire and sprinting out the door.

His whole body feels weird. It feels different in the way that he runs, and even the hallway looks odd at his new height. Having two arms is new, on top of everything else. Shiro decides to pointedly ignore this fact for the moment, in favour of knocking sharply on his own bedroom door.

Lance opens the door in a second, swinging it open and leaning casually on the doorframe.

“Sup, Shiro.” He winks and pops the finger guns. Shiro notes he’s still wearing pyjamas, and his hair is wild and slightly curled from sleeping. Is that what his hair actually looks like in the morning?

Shiro cringes. “Please never do that in my body again, Lance.”

Lance presses his lips together in amusement, but thankfully, drops his hands. “Sure. Okay, what’s up?”

“What’s up?” Shiro repeats incredulously. “Are you serious? We need to talk about what we're going to do! We physically can’t tell anyone what’s happening to us!”

“It’s fine. They’ll figure out we aren’t being ourselves and put two and two together. Besides we can sort this out ourselves in no time, we just need to get Pidge’s book. That’s probably got all sorts of stuff we can use in it.”

Shiro pinches his nose in frustration. How can Lance possibly be so calm? “Okay, let’s meet up after breakfast and try and sort this mess out.”

“Okay.” Lance flushes, suddenly looking shy. “What about, um- what are we going to do about showering and stuff?”

Shiro’s face is so hot he’s surprised steam isn’t coming off of his skin. He didn’t think of that.

God, why is this happening to him?

“Just don’t shower until we really, really have to, okay? Hopefully, it’ll all be sorted out by tonight once we’ve got Pidge’s book.”

Lance’s face twists in disgust. “What? Ew, Shiro, that’s like a whole day!” He looks aghast. “My skin!”

“Look, you can still do your skin routine on me, I don’t mind, but I feel like we should keep showering as a last resort.”

“Okay, fine.” Lance huffs. “But what about going to the toilet? I can hardly not do that all day.”

Shiro has never wanted to die more than this very moment.

“Yeah, toilet is a must. We can just, I don’t know, keep our eyes closed?” They both flush, avoiding each other's eyes.

“Okay, sure. Anyways.” Lance quickly changes the subject. “How did last night go? He buy it?”

“Yes, I think so.” Shiro crosses his arms. It feels weird to even think he has two arms now. “He said I was acting weird, but that was probably because I fell over when he tried to kiss me goodnight.” He rubs the back of his neck, shuddering at the memory.

Lance laughs. “Oh Dios, he’s probably so confused. I’m usually the forward one, he’s never even tried to go in for a kiss first.”

Shiro wrinkles his nose. He never wanted to know that.

Lance sees his expression and smirks, wiggling his eyebrows. Shiro just sighs.

This kid will be the death of him.

* * *

Shiro exits the dinner hall and immediately bumps into Lance, who is milling around outside.

“Finally.” He groans, dragging out his words. “I’ve been waiting for ages, what took you so long?”

“Don’t ask.” Shiro huffs, remembering his attempt at Lance’s normal chattiness.

Lance gives him a wary look at that.

“It’s fine.”

“Mhmm, okay.” He shakes his head. “Anyway, what are we going to do?” Lance looks at him expectantly.

“We’ll find the book, and hopefully it will tell us how to reverse the curse.”

“And if it doesn’t?”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” God, Shiro hopes they don’t have to cross that particular bridge. “Let’s go now, before anyone notices we’re gone.”

* * *

It takes them no less than three hours to find the book and realise they are well and truly fucked.

... _TO REVERSE THE CURSE ONCE IGNITED, ONE MUST USE THE ORIGINAL CRYSTAL TOO_...

They didn’t bother to translate the rest, realising that the text would be useless without the crystal.

“What are we going to do Shiro?” Lance’s breathing is shaky and Shiro’s leader mode is instantly activated.

His small fingers wrap around the cool metal and the heated skin of his own body, and Lance’s gaze snaps to him. “Calm down, Lance.”

“Fuck.” Lance breathes.

Shiro nods in agreement. “Fuck indeed.”

“You cursed!” Lance gasps exaggeratedly, pointing an accusatory finger at him, his earlier panic immediately forgotten. Shiro can’t help but feel proud of himself for getting Lance to calm down so quickly, but he knows it’s only a temporary fix. They need to sort this out, soon, and get back into their own bodies.

“Nope never happened.” Shiro shakes his head.

“Don’t bullshit me, Shiro! That totally fucking happened.”

“Language.” Shiro grins at Lance’s outraged expression.

“Oh, very funny.” Lance says mockingly.

“I know.” Shiro chuckles, enjoying Lance’s reaction to Shiro’s less serious side. Sometimes, Shiro wonders if the others remember that he’s only five years older than them and he also has no fucking clue what he’s doing with himself. “Look, we’ll find a way to reverse this, don’t worry.”

“How?!”

“I don’t know yet, but we will. We have the next step. At least we know what to do next.”

“Okay.” Lance looks as doubtful as Shiro feels.

“Let’s just try and act normal for now. We can ask the others if they did anything to it whilst we were down there. Knowing Pidge, she probably cut it out to research on it.”

“Probably.” Lance nods. “Thanks, Shiro.” He smiles and turns to leave.

Shiro goes to follow him, taking one last look at that bloody book.

Not that he was going to tell Lance this, but Shiro was starting to wonder if they really _were_ fucked.

* * *

“Hey, Pidge.” Shiro starts. The three of them are on the sofas watching a movie- one that had Shiro lost about five minutes in. Pidge seems equally confused by it and has been dozing on and off. “Do you know what happened to that crystal Lan- um, Shiro and I touched? It’s just that, Shiro was asking about it earlier.”

Pidge tsks apologetically, not bothering to open her eyes as she replies. “It’s probably still on the planet, why?”

Shitting shit. Back on the planet? How on earth are they going to find it now?

“Oh, no reason. I’m sure everything is fine.”

Everything was not fine.

“Okay.” Pidge yawns.

Hunk turns around and fixes them with a look, effectively shushing them both.

Pidge immediately disregards this. “Hey, Lance.”

The sound of the movie playing fills the otherwise silent room for a second before she speaks again.

“Hey!” She kicks Shiro’s leg all of a sudden.

“Ow!” He rubs his leg and frowns. Why did she kick _him?_

“Oh shut up, you big baby.” She kicks him again, snickering, and he suddenly remembers that he’s supposed to be Lance. “Lance?”

“Yes, Pidge?” He asks, before chastising himself. He needs to sound less serious. “I mean- what’s up, dude?” It comes out clumsy and awkward the way he says it, prompting Pidge to frown at him.

Shiro has no idea how to act around Pidge and Hunk. He’s suddenly beginning to realise how little time he spends with this half of the group. If he’s honest, he mainly spends his free time with Keith or Allura. He’s spent time with them of course, but only when it’s the entire group.

“Hey, I bet you can’t eat that bowl of food goo in a minute,” Pidge says randomly, seemingly moving past his weirdness.

“What? Of course I couldn’t.” Shiro’s brow furrows in bewilderment. Is that seriously what they get up to in their spare time? “That’s illogical.”

Hunk swivels around to stare at him. “Lance, since when do you talk like that?”

“Yeah, you sound like a twat.” Pidge cackles.

The ‘Language’ is on the tip of his tongue.

He is utterly failing at being normal.

Idly, he wonders if Lance is fairing with Allura. He suppresses a sigh. Probably not. Lance is probably bored out of his mind- Shiro and Allura usually go over tactics in their spare time. He can’t imagine Lance being interested in that.

At his silence, Pidge speaks again. “Whatever, if you’re too week to handle a simple challenge...” Pidge trails off suggestively.

Shiro stays silent, too wrapped up in his own thoughts. He hopes Lance stays with Allura today and not Keith- he really doesn’t need Keith thinking Shiro’s into him, on top of everything else that’s happening.

“Is this really happening?” Hunk whispers to Pidge, causing Shiro too look up. Both of them are staring at him in amazement.

Oops, Lance probably wouldn’t have ignored that challenge.

He groans internally, cursing Lance’s competitive behaviour. He really doesn’t want to puke today.

“I mean- of course I can, gremlin.” Shiro’s heard Lance call Pidge this countless times. “I’ll do it in _less_ than that!”

The concern seems to melt off their faces as excitement takes over.

“Ha!” Pidge snorts. “You’re going to regret saying that when your ass is puking.”

Shiro’s way ahead of her. He’s been regretting all of his decisions _way_ before he met her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiii sorry this was a bit short, but i hope u enjoyed anyways! :)
> 
> comments & kudos are very much appreciated! please let me know what you think of it so far  
> \+ if u have any suggestions on how you want the fic to go, i’m open to anything because i have ZERO ideas ahhhhhhh
> 
> okay, anyways- thanks for reading!


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